What women want!

You know what really turns a girl on? More than kisses more than hugs more than anything in this world - Honesty.

If you are in a relationship of any kind with a girl - friend, mother, sister, girl friend..anyone,if you are not yourself with her, if you are not honest with her you are gonna lose her respect if not her.

I say only respect and not her because girls have this weird habit of letting it go and giving another chance. For them the relationship is just too important to give up on you that easily. 

Even if you go and make out with another girl, even if you are a drug addict,even if you think that she is too possessive..even if you are married to another woman..but you still want to be with her..just come and tell her! believe me she'd eventually forgive you and still love you as much. 

For God's sake always be honest with her! She expects you to share all your troubles with her. If she's told you that she loves you that automatically means that she's gonna listen to all your troubles and try and make you comfortable as best as she can. Once she has fallen in love with you trust me she has already stopped judging you!! 

So kindly have the courage to tell her what you truly feel and what blunders you have truly committed! She will scold you only cuz it hurts to see someone she loves in trouble. You know she'd find out the truth anyway. But if YOU go and tell her, you'd not only feel lighter but also will earn her respect!

Pls be yourself.

I am not a feminist and well what ever I just said abt how girls give another chance and everything might be true for boys too. I was actually talking abt myself the whole time. Basically, the bottom line is I HATE LIARS!!! and I HATE PEOPLE WHO PRETEND!!!

Lost me somewhere in the dark....

Why do you have to take away a part of me everytime, leaving me being someone i'm actually not?

Maybe it's okay, for what it's worth, but in my moments of solitude i don't even recognize myself anymore. 


I'm alone and cold as a rock..


sadly, such moments come so very often that they have become an integral part of my existence


I'm tired of waiting on my own, being in the company of a reflection that's no more familiar to me.

I  miss me...

Hospital life

Hospital life is an alternate universe where time is different, people are different.,and we start ed to realise all those things ..the" value of life".. I’ve gotten so sick of myself with my 5 days spending in hospital...just  dont know where am i now?live or not?where ?...still cant able to cme back to my non-hospital life....

Just imagine a crowd of anxious people  outside the entrance of a door with a guard inside the room resisting the people from getting inside. So what do you assume by this crowd who wants to get inside the gallery? No, it's not a movie hall or a restaurant but the crowd that I am referring to is the relatives, who wish to have a look at their friends/spouse/wife/mother/parents/sons/husband/daughter/....etc who are inside the ICU (Intensive Care Unit.)

Yes, this was the darkest day of life for the person who was inside the ICU as well as their relatives who were both confused as well as worried about them.My uncle was suffering from liver cirrhosis.Now what is it?

Cirrhosis (say "suh-ROH-sus") is a very serious condition in which scarring damages the liver. The liver is a large organ that is part of the digestive system It does a wide range of complex jobs that are vital for life. For example, the liver:

• Makes many important substances, including bile to help digest food and clotting factirs. to help stop bleeding.
• Controls the amounts of sugar, protein, and fat in the bloodstream.
• Stores important vitamins and minerals, including iron.
• Filters poisons from the blood.
• Breaks down (metabolizes) alcohol and many drugs.

When a person has cirrhosis, scar tissue  replaces healthy tissue and prevents the liver from working as it should. For example, the liver may stop producing enough clotting factors, which can lead to bleeding and bruising. Bile and poisons may build up in the blood. Scarring can also cause high blood pressure in the vein that carries blood from the intestines through the liver . This can lead to severe bleeding in the digestive tract and other serious problems.

Cirrhosis can be deadly. But early treatment can help stop damage to the liver.

What causes cirrhosis?

Cirrhosis can have many causes. Some of the main ones include:

• Long-term, heavy use of alcohol.
• autoimmune hepatitis or primary sclerosing cholangitis (PSC).
• Blocked bile ducts. A disease called primary biliary cirrhosis develops when the ducts that carry bile out of the liver become inflamed and blocked.
• Inherited diseases,

Less common causes of cirrhosis include severe reactions to medicines or long-term exposure to poisons, such as arsenic. Some people have cirrhosis without an obvious cause.

What are the symptoms?

You may not have symptoms in the early stages of cirrhosis. As it progresses, it can cause a number of symptoms, including:

• Extreme tiredness and weakness.
• Nosebleeds and easy bruising.
• Weight loss.
• Belly pain or discomfort.
• Yellowing of the skin
• Itching.
• Fluid buildup in the legs, called edema (say "ih-DEE-muh"), and in the belly, called ascites (say "uh-SIGH-teez").
• Bleeding in the stomach or in the esophagus, the tube that leads from the mouth to the stomach. 

How is it treated?

Liver damage from cirrhosis cannot be reversed, but treatment can stop or delay a worsening of the damage and reduce complications. The first important step is to remove what is causing the damage, if possible. For example, if your cirrhosis is caused by alcohol abuse, you must stop drinking any alcohol. Treatment for hepatitis-related cirrhosis involves medicines used to treat the different types of hepatitis, such as interferon for viral hepatitis. If an intestinal bypass for obesity is the cause, the bypass needs to be surgically reversed.

In all cases, regardless of the cause, having a healthy diet is essential because the body needs all the recommended nutrients to keep the tissues healthy. To keep from hurting your liver more, you must not drink any alcohol. Because your liver is not working properly, you may need vitamin supplements and may have to change your diet.

Cirrhosis can cause problems in other parts of your body and these will need to be treated. For example, fluid may build up in your abdomen. Or you may have bleeding from the esophagus, causing bloody vomit, or bleeding in the stomach, causing bloody or tarlike bowel movements. Medicine can help control the buildup of fluid in the abdomen. Surgery may be needed to treat sites of bleeding in the stomach and esophagus.

A liver transplant is the ultimate treatment for cirrhosis. If the cause of the cirrhosis, such as alcohol abuse, can be removed or controlled and if you are healthy enough, a transplant is an option. But liver transplants are very expensive. Not all insurers will pay for liver transplants for all conditions. Also, the wait for a liver to transplant may be too long.

How long will the effects last?

If the liver continues to be injured, the cirrhosis will get worse and more liver cells will stop working. This can lead to death.

If there is no further injury, the cirrhosis may not get worse and the remaining unscarred cells will continue to do the important work of the liver.

 I just want you guys to know about all these problems ...there are so many ppl who wr drinking so much ..they dont know what is happening in them? one must keep cpntrol over this...the after effects  are very crucial ..one can't imagine all that... in these days i had seen all those stuffs.. very painful... only the victims is not suffering the pain.. the relatives,friends,..all......it destroys everything in your life...when you realises all these things you may be too late....

Ask any child, partner, or parent with an alcoholic in the family and they will tell you that when someone they love drinks alcohol compulsively, the effects are painful.  Alcohol addiction is a disease that destroys families.  Alcoholism can derail a family’s day-to-day existence, rob them of their financial security, and cause such harmful emotional damage that many family members live their lives scarred from its caustic effects.

As a chronic disease, alcoholism destroys relationships (including marriages) and lives. It often causes a great deal of denial and lying about drinking behavior, and it isolates a person from loved ones. People who drink are often depressed and seek an outlet to numb those negative feelings, but it backfires. In the end, alcoholism destroys life of the alcoholic and adversely affects those around him or her.

when I started to know about  all these things I just wanted to share about all the stuff with you guys...please take it seriously ...

 Coming back to the hospital life..............

This was the disease  that my uncle  got these days...t.I think its the crucial stage of life waiting outside  and asking permission to some strangers to see  our loved ones whom we wr seen all the time...I just hate this  thing... its better to die in home than in hospital..atleast we can be with our loved ones in  the last hours....When I entered the ICU i just wondered ...I saw the patients covered with wires all around and you could hardly recognize who is your relative as different types of wires are put on their face with a small monitoring machine and there were not just one machine but a couple of them.Then I saw my uncle..he is better than the other patients..At one glance to a patient near my uncle, I saw an old man who was struggling for life. I was so surprised to see the nurses being so calm and comfort with their duty in providing the old man with some oxygen masks or some stuffs which I did not have any idea about it, but the man was struggling and I could hear his breath gasping out loud. This made me to think, "Did he ever think of having such a painful life?", "Will he be able to come out of this painful situation?"...etc 

Well, this was the darkest days of my life. I came out of the ICU and went out . The picture of the old man, his eyes, the sound of his breath...etc disturbed me a lot and I could not concentrate my mind. Then I  saw a couple   who were  very happy when coming back to home  in bus... Then I thought for a while that a time will come when they will become old one day. Will they remember those beautiful days that they enjoyed, the jokes they cracked, the beautiful romantic evening? But I thought that how stupid I was to think that way. 

When one member of a family stays in a hospital then the whole family has to undergo the tensions and sufferings caused due to the patient. Whatever be, everybody wants their  relatives for a speedy recovery. But one thing that I want to say you that just visit a hospital once in a month and see the dark side of life. Sounds stupid again, I guess. But try to be practical.

Life is not really a bed of roses. The thorns are too thorny and they may prick you in no time. I am not saying that you should not enjoy life but what I mean is that just experience the bitter tastes of life.Waking up in the morning, speeding up to the office, returning back to the four walls of your room after 8-9 hrs of work is not life at all. So, what I mean is that one should also tastes the dark side of life. So enjoy life and also have a bitter taste of life because nobody knows what future holds for you tomorrow. You will never be able to forget those depressing moments in your entire lifetime. 
But get prepared in life for the calamity that you will have to face inthe course of your life

ENDOSULFAN-THE SILENT KILLER

Speak it out.....how many times have we heard this or said this to someone??

yes....speak it out...else what use are those thoughts...those feelings..those love...those care..those ideas...what is the use if they stay in your mind?????

so its now time to react...

we have seen a lot of victims of endosulafan in our GOD's OWN COUNTRY..evryone knws its harmful and it's killing ppl.,but why we all are keeping silence??by knowing all these facts why shuld we keep our mouth shut???????we all are one..equal as a human being...as a citizen ..so it's our responsibility to save the life of our dearones...so we should open our eyes towards this calamity..and we must do something ban this chemical pesticide and must do something ...not something..must do the best to the victims to help them to start their life once again...

We knw that in kerala we can't avoid agricultural practices.. there are more and more invetions are made in our day to day life.. all are meant for improving our life styles...like we are using chemical pesticides to protect our crops..but why we can't stop this by knowing all the problems that are created by this pecticide?after all it is meant for the good of human beings...what is the need of a thing that making our life terrible????????Let us join our hands together and fight to eliminate this completely from our country....

What is endosulfan?

Endosulfan has been used to control insect pests and in wood preservation, home gardening, and tse-tse fly control. It is a Xenoestrogen which is a synthetic substance that imitates or enhances the effect of estrogens that can act as an endocrine disruptor, causing reproductive and developmental damage in both animals and humans. Whether Endosulfan can cause cancer is yet to be confirmed and studies are going on in the matter.

Endosulfan belongs to the group of highly toxic chemicals called persistent organic pollutants (POPs) and has already been banned in 56 countries because of its high toxicity and environmental contamination.

Exposure to Endosulfan happens mostly from eating contaminated food, but may also occur from skin contact, breathing contaminated air, or drinking contaminated water. Endosulfan affects the function of the central nervous system. Endosulfan affects the central nervous system and prevents it from working properly. Hyperactivity, nausea, dizziness, headache, or convulsions have been observed in adults exposed to high doses. Severe poisoning may result in death. Studies of the effects of Endosulfan on animals suggest that long-term exposure to Endosulfan can also damage the kidneys, testes, and liver and may possibly affect the body’s ability to fight infection.

ENDOSULFAN IN KERALA

The plantations in kasaragod dist.have been in the air spraying with the substance pesticide Endosulfan since 1976, frequently till 2001. In 2001 Endosulfan spraying became suspect when linked to a series of abnormalities noted in local children. Initially Endosulfan was banned, yet under pressure from the pesticide industry this ban was largely revoked. The situation there has been called “next in magnitude only to the Bhopal gas tragedy.” In 2006, in Kerala, compensation of Rs 50,000 was paid to the next kin of each of 135 people who were identified as having died as a result of Endosulfan use.

But the Health and Environmental hazards’ suffering by the people and nature due to the use of Endosulfan in Kasaragod District is a burning issue for the past few years and is still above. Hundreds of deaths and disorders reported. distressingly high levels of Endosulfan residues have been detected in the blood and breast milk of villagers in this area. In the affected areas, it is observed that birds and butterflies disappeared, fish and frogs in the ponds and streams found die.Wide spread ailments and severe health problems were reported.

Enquiry Commissions:

Govt of Kerala and Govt. of India had appointed 11 various commissions to inquire about the issue. Various Non Govt.Organisations also made some studies at their own level. Most of the studies revealed the hazards of Endosulfan use and its impact on the food, water and beverages. These enquiry reports somehow finds that pesticide Endosulfan is responsible for the horrendous mutations and ailments that many in the villages of Kasaragod district are suffering form.

ENDOSULFAN VICTIMS

still they are suffering...The plantations are located in mountain areas. The sprayed Endosulfan and its residues drained with rain water and thereby reached almost all sources of drinking water.Now, the poor villagers who lived close to the plantation are in deep trouble. Different types of known and unknown illness pushed them into a war like situation.

*

Who will save these children?

*

Who will help them to survive further in their life?

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Who will come forward to help thousands of families affected by this pesticide?

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A ban of this pesticide cannot be the final solution- Who will order the pesticide manufacturing companies to provide compensation for these poor people?(I just don't have an idea how they are manufacturing it..how those ppl are working with this chemical?if it can creat this much problems ..why it doesnt cause any problems to the workers????what are the precautions they are taking????no idea..)


There are so many questions... no one gives a perfect answer? Don't we need a solution to end this calamity...Yes we need...but there is no end to discussions of ending endosulfan...so let's join our hands together and be a part and do something for saving our nature...

ennu njan oru puthu kavitha thudangi vechu

orayiram ormakall,chinthakal,mohangal,swapnagal

                                ellam kadannu poi..

njan orukki vechoru vakkukal,chithrangal,kazhchakal..

                                  ellam marannu poi..!!!!

chirakattu poyen kinakkalum,munayodinjen thoolikayum..

                    kanan marannoree kinakkalum ennarukil..

clavu pidichoren ormakal njan thechu minukkatteyoo...?

                   njan enne onnariyatteyoo...????????

varnapakittarnnaoren swapnangal chithalarichuvo...

peythirangiyori chattal mazha en swapnangl than varngal maychuvo...

ente viralukal nishchalamakunnu......

shoonyamam en kadalasin mizhiyil nanavo..?

en viralotti nikkume thoolika than mooracha kanditto...

illa... ente vedana than mashikkara purandoree

                 thoolikathumbinal  pidayenda neeyum..

ente thettin bakkipathramakenda..

pidayunnoree nenjin vingalukal nee eettu vangenda..

            

njan parayunna bhashayil orayiram thettukal..

                   parayatha vakkukalil orayiram novukal...

  ennil koodanayatte ava bhdramayii..

                   pidayunnoree nenjinu koottayiii........

.... Restless mind.....

when we play video games , there are times we get stuck  at one level without knowing how to go the next level.However things  get boring when  you are not sure what  happens next..,forget about how to reach there.

I am stuck in this phase of game what we call life.I have crossed many obstructions .. but now i feel stuck.I cannot see the next level.. and hence obviously  the way to reach there.Its sure that there is an another level for this game... Till I found it  I roam here and there....I just feel I am something which fills the vacuum in everyone's life ...,,nothing more...

Logically speaking you people may say that I get married and that is the next level in this game..but I am pretty sure that  its not the level that I want to jump to.. There has to be something else..

Have you ever seen a dream in which you miserably want something and you are moving away from it...or a dream a person you love going away from you??????what .. if it happens in life?? you want something with your full heart and letting it go away from your view...strange na????

Unexpected as always... few things never planned happened...few faces never imagined seen..

I never thought that I,ll   go on this much  with  my job... actually I don't know it till now whetherI liked my job or not//but its now almost becoming 1 yr since I joined there..I simply thought of leaving it  at one point of time.. but what to say ... now am here ...whether I want it or not.. I am here...!!!!!!!

I am scared....Because I know I can,t love this work and honestly saying I hate it sometimes.. this is not my future  and this is not where I wanna be...I have my dreams and plans for future..., they are different...But somehow I know till the time I am here..I will do it with my all   interest and  love...

I am not in a mood to arrange the word that I got in mind..I guess it was more like writing a diary..

Now not going  into the details of my love  for job &carrier , there is one more thing that I want to share with you all .. The interesting thing is that .. Recently I did an interview section for a local channel .. something what is another thing related to my work ... I must say  ..It was an amazing experience...and now am gonna  hide one more thing very brilliantly from you .. is that I don't  give you any details of the channel,,,,;-)

I was so much happy being a student.. don't know what happened ???? don't know why I am here??..This is not something I wanted...I can feel the suffocation inside...You know some days when I leave my work for home I feel crying..I carry so much of hurt inside..something like badly wounded..I feel like am in  a world of ppl where everybody is busy and just playing games with life .,n giving all  their deeds a name like love friendship,,bla bla....without any  sense of emotion ...May be am not liking anything nor I can cope up with it..that's why it's making me so negative... darkness and fear is all over my mind...I am angry with you GOD..!I never expected this from you..If you are punishing me for my sins then I guess you should stop now it's already too much!!!!!

Ooh.. my blog is now more towards negativity ..which I  don't wanna be...I can do well in life.. don't know why am wasting myself?... hm.. am going to finish this sad stuff here...Any how I  cant stop loving you God...And I am thankful to you for all the  good things you gave me... My  family.. My Mother...My friends

and of course many other things too.. But please help me out of these.... You know I am in trouble...

Note:;This is one of the most intense mood fluctuations... Nothing to worry... I will be fine soon...;-)

...it's me....

You wanted to know the worst about me, the things I told no one and hid below the surface. How do I explain it? How do I explain who I am when I am not even sure of it myself? How do I put into words the worst parts of me that I have run from for so long? I will tell you my secrets, I will tell you everything. Maybe it will help me. Maybe you will hate me for it or maybe you will understand. I don't know, but I am sick of running. So here it is, I will give you what you want.

I hate you. That is not true, but sometimes I think it is. I will not answer the phone when you call, even though I want to talk to you. I will not call you, even though it is all I want to do. I will not reach out to you, even though every part of me wants to. I will be mad at you, I will want to hurt you, I will drive you away because I am afraid to let you closer. I need your constant attention, your reassurances, but I will greet them with cold indifference. I will be jealous of the attention you give others, and I will get mad at you for ignoring me. I will feel close to you and care for you one day, only to be mad and want you out of my life the next.

I am an emotional fool, maybe I always have been. I take each event, each day, each conversation as a seperate event, always looking for signs that you might hurt me. When I feel neglected, I will get mad and forget that the day before you told me how much you cared. I am an inconsistent mess. There is a part of me who is happy and confident and another part that is insecure and needy. These days, I never know which one it will be. Every time I think I am in control, that I know you care and I feel comfortable with our relationship, the fear and doubt will come back. Maybe with time it will go away completely, but doubt it. All it will take is another close relationship, another new friend, another day and it will be back.

You ask what you can do and I do not know what to say. The needy part of me wants your constant attention, it needs your words and thoughts, your presence. But I know that is not the answer, I must accept the limitations on our relationship. The scared part of me wants you out of my life because it would be easier. The hateful part of me wants to hurt you because it thinks you have hurt me. All I can ask you to do is to understand, to not give up. I will ignore you at times, I may be rude to you, I may try to hurt you. I may hide from you and wait for you to reach out to me, so I know you will care. It is not fair to do these things, but I will. I cannot ask you to put up with this, it is not fair and no matter how I act, I care too much to put you through this. But you asked, and this is all I have to tell you.

I do not like this. I do not like that I am needy and clinging. I do not like that I hurt people. I do not like that I am rude and sarcastic to those around me. I do not like this part of myself. For years, I have ignored this and pretended it was me, but I have realized that is wrong. This is not me, it is a false identity created to protect me from the world. This was not an easy realization, and perhaps I haven't fully accepted it yet. But I have found my path, I have realized I can change and I can accept this side of me and keep it from becoming who I am. It will not be easy and it will not be quick, but I have faith that I can do it. Perhaps one day I will see me as the person you see behind my defenses, and perhaps one day I will let others see that person as well.

This is for you...., but you are many people. You are the people close to me now. You are the people I want to be close to even though I have kept you away. You are the friends I have pushed away in the past, the friends I never forgave and never let back in my life, the friends I never had the chance to tell this to. You are the people I will meet in the future, the people I will care about until once again I push them out of my life. You are the part of me that is still trying to understand who I am. You are all of these people and many more.